38 Best Sex Toys for Couples in 2025 Bring Fresh Vibes
GQ RecommendsEveryone from newbies to kink queens and kings can enjoy bringing some new vibes into the room.By Kate SloanJanuary 16, 2025Illustration by Simon AbranowiczSave this storySaveSave this storySaveAll products are independently selected by our editors. If you buy something, we may earn an affiliate commission.No matter how wild or mild romps with your partner(s) tend to be, you can always rev things up with the best sex toys for couples. Far from being obtrusive or excessive, top-tier couples’ toys are designed to integrate seamlessly into the sex you’re already having, or to open you up to new types of intimacy you’ve never explored before. Whether you’re hoping to find a toy that targets the clit, penis, G-spot, prostate, or any other erogenous zone, there are many options on the market that’ll do the job and then some. Check out the variety of tried-and-tested toys below, from luxe vibrators to prostate pleasurers, and watch your sex life transform before your very eyes.The Best Sex Toys for Couples, According to GQThough there are dozens of options in this list, we've assembled some of the most popular choices for your quick perusal below.The Best G-Spot Vibrator: Maude Spot, $79The Best Rabbit Vibrator: We-Vibe Nova 2, $149The Best Self-Thrusting Prostate Massager: Lelo Loki Wave, $219The Best Vibrating Cock Ring: Tenga SVR, $69The Best Finger Vibrator: Dame Fin, $65The Best Long-Distance Sex Toy: We-Vibe Sync, $149The Best Bondage Gear: Sportsheets Under-the-Bed Restraints System, $38The Best Panty Vibrator: Lovense Ferri, $119The Best Sexual Handcuffs: Upko, $120The Best Vibrating Butt Plug: Lovense Hush 2, $119The Best Stroking Toy: Fleshlight Quickshot, $35The Couples Sex Toy FAQ:→ Why couples should use sex toys together→ What makes a good sex toy for couples→ How to introduce toys into your sex life with your partner→ How we chose the best sex toys for you and your partner→ Meet the sexpertsThe Best G-Spot Vibrator: Maude SpotMaudeSpot$79 MaudeEase of Use: 4 / 5 | Durability: 4 / 5 | Fun Factor: 4.5 / 5 | Features: 3.5 / 5 | Value: 3.5 / 5 | Overall Rating: 3.9 / 5Materials: SiliconeBattery Life: 2 hoursWhy you'll like it: One vibrator to rule them all sounds pretty good, and when it comes to Maude's Spot, it's great for all kinds of couple play. The wand-like device features five vibration speeds, which are easily cycled through using the device's single-button operation. Spot's ergonomic shape also enables it to hit both the G-spot and P-spot. Just make sure to use this with a water-based lubricant, and if you're into a little shower play, this toy's water resistance even lets you bring the fun to the tub. (Just don't fully submerge it under water.)The Best Rabbit Vibrator: We-Vibe Nova 2ChevronChevronWe-VibeNova 2$149 BabelandEase of Use: 3.5 / 5 | Durability: 4 / 5 | Fun Factor: 4 / 5 | Features: 4 / 5 | Value: 3.5 / 5 | Overall Rating: 3.8 / 5Materials: SiliconeBattery life: Up to 2 hoursWhy you'll like it: Rabbit vibrators are fun to use either solo or with a partner. They provide both external and internal stimulation at the same time, potentially aiding in the pursuit of "blended orgasms." We've found that this one is especially great for thrusting in and out, if you're into that. Its internal curve hits the G-spot brilliantly, and its bendy external arm maintains contact with the clit when you thrust, unlike that of most other rabbit vibes. It can also be controlled from a distance using the We-Vibe app.The Best Self-Thrusting Prostate Massager: Lelo Loki WaveChevronChevronLeloLoki Wave$219 $110 Lelo$189 AmazonEase of Use: 3.5 / 5 Durability: 4 / 5Fun Factor: 4 / 5Features: 5 / 5Value: 4.5 / 5Overall Rating: 4.2 / 5Materials: Silicone and ABS plasticBattery Life: 2 hoursWhy you'll like it: With one external arm that thrums against the perineum and one internal arm that rhythmically strokes the prostate, this toy creates some of the most intense-in-a-good-way anal sensations imaginable. Combining it with a blowjob or handjob would make it even more explosive.The Best Vibrating Cock Ring: Tenga SVRChevronChevronTengaSVR$65 AmazonEase of Use: 4 / 5Durability: 3.5 / 5Fun Factor: 3 / 5Features: 3.5 / 5Value: 3.5 / 5Overall Rating: 3.5 / 5Materials: Silicone and ABS plasticBattery Life: Up to 1 hourWhy you'll like it: This vibrating cock ring has a deep, satisfying motor, which enhances sensation for both partners when the vibrating part hits the clitoris or perineum during penetrative sex. The vibrations are so good that I sometimes just use this vibe on its own for clitoral stimulation; it's a good toy for travel because it's so small and multi-purpose.The Best Low-Profile Pressure-Wave Stimulator: We-Vibe MeltWe-VibeMelt$149 Lovehoney$149 AmazonEase of Use: 4 / 5Durability: 4 / 5Fun Factor: 4 / 5Features: 4 / 5Value: 4 / 5Overall Rating: 4 / 5Materials: SiliconeBattery Life: 2 hoursWhy you'll like it: This petite toy uses rhythmic pulses of air to create clitoral sensations that m
All products are independently selected by our editors. If you buy something, we may earn an affiliate commission.
No matter how wild or mild romps with your partner(s) tend to be, you can always rev things up with the best sex toys for couples. Far from being obtrusive or excessive, top-tier couples’ toys are designed to integrate seamlessly into the sex you’re already having, or to open you up to new types of intimacy you’ve never explored before. Whether you’re hoping to find a toy that targets the clit, penis, G-spot, prostate, or any other erogenous zone, there are many options on the market that’ll do the job and then some. Check out the variety of tried-and-tested toys below, from luxe vibrators to prostate pleasurers, and watch your sex life transform before your very eyes.
The Best Sex Toys for Couples, According to GQ
Though there are dozens of options in this list, we've assembled some of the most popular choices for your quick perusal below.
- The Best G-Spot Vibrator: Maude Spot, $79
- The Best Rabbit Vibrator: We-Vibe Nova 2, $149
- The Best Self-Thrusting Prostate Massager: Lelo Loki Wave, $219
- The Best Vibrating Cock Ring: Tenga SVR, $69
- The Best Finger Vibrator: Dame Fin, $65
- The Best Long-Distance Sex Toy: We-Vibe Sync, $149
- The Best Bondage Gear: Sportsheets Under-the-Bed Restraints System, $38
- The Best Panty Vibrator: Lovense Ferri, $119
- The Best Sexual Handcuffs: Upko, $120
- The Best Vibrating Butt Plug: Lovense Hush 2, $119
- The Best Stroking Toy: Fleshlight Quickshot, $35
The Couples Sex Toy FAQ:
→ Why couples should use sex toys together
→ What makes a good sex toy for couples
→ How to introduce toys into your sex life with your partner
→ How we chose the best sex toys for you and your partner
→ Meet the sexperts
The Best G-Spot Vibrator: Maude Spot
Why you'll like it: One vibrator to rule them all sounds pretty good, and when it comes to Maude's Spot, it's great for all kinds of couple play. The wand-like device features five vibration speeds, which are easily cycled through using the device's single-button operation. Spot's ergonomic shape also enables it to hit both the G-spot and P-spot. Just make sure to use this with a water-based lubricant, and if you're into a little shower play, this toy's water resistance even lets you bring the fun to the tub. (Just don't fully submerge it under water.)
The Best Rabbit Vibrator: We-Vibe Nova 2
Why you'll like it: Rabbit vibrators are fun to use either solo or with a partner. They provide both external and internal stimulation at the same time, potentially aiding in the pursuit of "blended orgasms." We've found that this one is especially great for thrusting in and out, if you're into that. Its internal curve hits the G-spot brilliantly, and its bendy external arm maintains contact with the clit when you thrust, unlike that of most other rabbit vibes. It can also be controlled from a distance using the We-Vibe app.
The Best Self-Thrusting Prostate Massager: Lelo Loki Wave
Why you'll like it: With one external arm that thrums against the perineum and one internal arm that rhythmically strokes the prostate, this toy creates some of the most intense-in-a-good-way anal sensations imaginable. Combining it with a blowjob or handjob would make it even more explosive.
The Best Vibrating Cock Ring: Tenga SVR
Why you'll like it: This vibrating cock ring has a deep, satisfying motor, which enhances sensation for both partners when the vibrating part hits the clitoris or perineum during penetrative sex. The vibrations are so good that I sometimes just use this vibe on its own for clitoral stimulation; it's a good toy for travel because it's so small and multi-purpose.
The Best Low-Profile Pressure-Wave Stimulator: We-Vibe Melt
Why you'll like it: This petite toy uses rhythmic pulses of air to create clitoral sensations that mimic great oral sex—but unlike many other toys with this technology, the We-Vibe Melt is slim enough to slip between bodies easily during penetrative sex. I've found that this can result in awesome blended orgasms, without anybody having to bend their wrist at an awkward angle like some toys require.
The Best Hands-Free Vibrator: We-Vibe Sync
Why you'll like it: Many other companies have tried to riff on We-Vibe's signature C-shaped vibrator design, but the original is still the best of the best. Meant to be used vaginally during intercourse, the app-controlled We-Vibe stimulates both partners at once, for stellar (and possibly simultaneous) orgasms. In my testing sessions, this vibe has always stayed put much better than its competitors, probably because of the hinges at the center of the toy that allow you to achieve your perfect fit.
The Best Stroking Toy: Fleshlight Quickshot
Why you'll like it: Fleshlight is the biggest name in the stroker game, and for good reason: The ribbed texture inside this one is ultra-stimulating. The Quickshot differs from your standard Fleshlight, though, in that it's open on both ends—which makes cleanup less messy and annoying. The other major benefit of the open-ended design is that you can incorporate this toy into a blowjob or handjob – I've found that this technique is always a hit!
The Best Body-Contoured Clitoral Vibrator: Lelo Nea
Why you'll like it: Sex therapist Chelsie Reed says this cute vibe is a good choice for beginners because it's small, unobtrusive, and fits in the palm of your hand. It's designed to fit the natural curve of the vulva, so it's super comfortable to use clitorally during penetrative sex.
The Best Vibrator for Penises and Other Pleasure Points: Hot Octopuss Pulse III Duo
Why you'll like it: This vibrator curves around your shaft, stimulating all its most sensitive spots whether you're erect or flaccid. Best of all, the underside of the toy vibrates, as well, so your partner can grind against it while you use it. If you love dry-humping but would love it more if it were, well, less “dry,” this is the toy for you!
The Best Strap-On: Tantus Beginner's Strap-On Kit
Why you'll like it: Curious about pegging? This set will get you started: It comes with an adjustable harness, two differently-sized dildos (including one super-small one for total newbies to butt stuff), and a bullet vibe you can slip behind the dildo to make sure you both enjoy yourselves. Throw some water-based lube into the mix and you're good to go! I eventually upgraded to a leather harness because it's comfier against the skin than the backpack-strap fabric of this one, but for a beginner who's not even sure whether they'll like strap-on sex, this is a great starter kit.
The Best Sex Toy for Shower Sex: Je Joue Mio Cock Ring
Why you'll like it: It's high-time we stopped pushing the shower sex agenda, because, really, it’s never as good as you think it’s going to be. Water gets in your eyes, you can’t get enough friction, and you could slip and really hurt yourself. But a select few really enjoy shower sex, and if you or your partner is among that crowd, then go ahead and get this water-proof vibrating cock ring to add even more to the experience.
The Best Sex Toy for Back Door Beginners: b-Vibe
Why you'll like it: Petite but highly efficient, the b-Vibe isn’t your ordinary vibrating butt plug. The device actually replicates the sensation of being rimmed, which, yeah, feels great. Its rotating beads make the “rimming” part of this toy feel so good, and there are seven types of patterns with varying intensity levels.
The Classic-for-a-Reason Sex Toy: Cordless Magic Wand
Why you'll like it: Ownership of one of these is basically required for all horny adults. The cordless, rechargeable version of the original wand works just as well, except you can enter the bone zone anywhere. (In the olden days, couples used to have to boink next to an outlet.) Use it on your partner’s clitoris during sex, or honestly, just as a back massager. This thing really feels good anywhere. I keep one near my bed at all times, in case of a sex emergency (or a sore muscles emergency) – it really is that good.
The Best Positioning Aid: Liberator Wedge
Why you'll like it: Dr. Reed recommends this comfy foam wedge for couples who need a little help with positioning during sex, whether that's due to lowered mobility or weaker knees from aging or injury, or just wanting a different angle or depth of penetration. Tuck it under your bed between sessions for discreet storage.
The Best Panty Vibrator: Lovense Ferri
Why you'll like it: Tuck this magnetic panty vibe into your underwear, or have your partner do so, and connect it to Lovense's app via Bluetooth. Then you can control the vibe with your phone, whether the person wearing it is sitting across the dinner table from you or halfway around the world. I've found that Lovense's toys have more reliable connectivity than many other Bluetooth-compatible vibes, which I really appreciate – nothing kills the mood like troubleshooting a tech problem.
The Best All-in-One Bondage Kit: Sportsheets Under-the-Bed Restraints System
Why you'll like it: Experimenting with bondage doesn't have to be intimidating! This restraints kit attaches to your bed, is easy and quick to set up, and can be tucked away quickly if you have guests coming over. It comes with two wrist cuffs and two ankle cuffs, so you can put your partner into a variety of different spread-eagle positions for some kinky fun. I love that this product encourages spontaneity – once it's set up, you can do impromptu bondage whenever you want, and that freedom and ease have made my sex life a whole lot kinkier.
The Best Penis Vibrator: Fun Factory Manta
Why you'll like it: This toy curves to hug your shaft, vibrating your most sensitive spots as you move it up and down or hold it still. It pairs deliciously well with oral sex – vibrating blowjob, anyone? It's also waterproof, so feel free to take it with you into the tub or shower. I like using this vibe on my partner when I want to mix things up; a basic handjob can't hold a candle to the Manta.
The Best Nipple Clamps: CalExotics
Why you'll like it: If you like nipple stimulation—pain, pleasure, or both!—a pair of nipple clamps would be a good addition to your bedside drawer. These ones are adjustable, so they can fit a range of different nipple sizes and can start at a low level of pressure so newbies can acclimate themselves to the sensation. I love that these have a chain between them, both because it's harder to misplace an individual clamp when they're connected, and because a well-timed tug on the chain can add emphasis and excitement during sex any time you want.
The Best Mini Wand Vibrator: Vibratex Magic Wand Mini
Why you'll like it: The Magic Wand is such a classic that its makers decided to release a miniature version, and not only is it adorable, but it feels pretty damn good, too. While it doesn't offer quite the same thrilling rumble of the OG wand, the trade-off is that it's much easier to slide between bodies and move around, due to being so small and light. I often reach for this wand when I just want to get off quickly at the end of a long day, as it's less tiring to use than a full-size wand.
The Best Vaginal Plug: Hole Punch Toys Fluke
Why you'll like it: You've heard of dildos, and you've heard of butt plugs, but have you heard of vaginal plugs? They're designed to be "worn" vaginally, and can provide G-spot stimulation and a feeling of fullness without you having to do much at all. We've found this one works exceptionally well during oral sex, intensifying the sensations and orgasm(s). With its two-inch diameter, it's on the larger side, so it won't work for everyone, but it's a great toy to have in your arsenal because there are almost no other toys like it.
The Best Anal Beginners' Kit: B-Vibe Anal Massage and Education Set
Why you'll like it: Curious about anal play? This set might be the best possible introduction to it. Inside, you'll find a small weighted butt plug, a wand vibrator with an anal-safe attachment, an enema, a lube applicator, nitrile gloves, finger condoms, a small towel, a guide to anal pleasure, and a travel pouch to keep it all in. The wand vibe can be used on its own, for anything from clitoral stimulation to body massage, or you can pair it with the included attachment to hit your prostate. Add some lube to your cart and you're ready to embark on an anal adventure.
The Best Vibrating Butt Plug: Lovense Hush 2
Why you'll like it: You'd never know from the simple design of this butt plug just how technologically advanced it is: It can be connected wirelessly to the Lovense app, which you can use to create your own vibration patterns or even sync up the vibrations to music. It's the perfect choice for surreptitious public anal play, or for long-distance couples who want to connect from afar.
The Best BDSM Toy for Couples: NS Novelties Bondage Couture 6-Piece Bondage Kit
Why you'll like it: Kink can look very different from couple to couple, which is why BDSM newbies might want to start off with a kit packed with various accoutrements to try out. Maybe your favorite will be the flogger, or the blindfold, or the leash—you won't know until you try. I've found that faux leather kink equipment doesn't last as long or feel as nice against the skin as real leather. But on the plus side, this whole set is vegan, and it's amazingly affordable for the cornucopia of kink gear you get.
The Best Clit Vibrator for Couples: We-Vibe Tango X
Why you'll like it: This nifty little vibrator's design encourages you to dream up new ways to use it during play, adding clitoral stimulation into nearly any position with its deep, rumbly vibrations. I especially like the way it fits between bodies in missionary—if our pelvises are pressed together, the vibe stays put without me having to hold it in place. The Tango X also has a travel lock, so you can take it with you on a romantic couples' getaway without it turning into a buzzing TSA alert.
The Best Couples' Sex Toy Overall: Njoy Pure Wand
Why you'll like it: Want a sex toy that you both can enjoy, regardless of your gender or anatomy? This is the one. Known as a legendarily good G-spot dildo, the gleaming Pure Wand also works wonderfully for prostate play, while the smaller end is slim enough that even anal newbies can enjoy it. I love using this toy (or having it used on me) with a partner because the shape makes it easy to hold and thrust with. And because—TMI alert—it induces a frankly irresponsible amount of squirting. (Obviously, your mileage may vary on that.)
The Best Toy for Gay Couples: Oxballs Atomic Jock
Why you'll like it: This stretchy rubber piece has two holes: one on the base that circles the top of your balls, and another (the one you're looking through in the photo above) that works like a cock ring. Together they make for an enjoyable squeeze-and-pull sensation that can enhance anything else you're up to, from handjobs to oral sex to anal. The cock ring part of this toy will help keep you harder for longer, while the “base” will push your balls forward and downward slightly, putting them front-and-center for your partner to play with.
The Best Toy for Lesbian Couples: Silicone Bendable Strap-On
Why you'll like it: Some people find so-called “strapless strap-ons,” like this one more comfortable and convenient than using a harness and a dildo. The egg-shaped end sits inside the vagina, allowing her to thrust the penis-shaped portion. Compared to the buckle-and-leather alternative, this style can help the thruster feel more closely connected to a partner, since it allows for more skin-to-skin contact and the egg stimulates the wearer's internal hotspots during use.
I like this one in particular because of its thick bulb with an adjustable angle to ensure it's hitting the wearer's G-spot while they're hitting all the right spots on their partner. That said, a strapless strap-on like this tends to be less stable than a traditional strap-on, so the thruster needs to work a little carefully and keep an eye on things to make sure the dildo doesn't slip out.
The Best Basic Cock Ring: Super Soft Silicone C-Ring
One cheap and quick way to upgrade your sex life is to pick up a simple silicone cock ring like this one. It'll improve your erection strength and sensitivity, which you and your partner can both enjoy. I like this one in particular because it's relatively flat and wide for a cock ring, allowing it to stay in place well, and its edges are rounded for comfort.
The Best Long-Distance Vibrating Stroker: Max 2
This high-tech stroker can vibrate your dick and rhythmically squeeze it at the same time, making for a super-stimulating experience whether you're using it solo or a partner. Connect it to Lovense's app and you can even use it long-distance – it's one of my favorite ways to give my partner pleasure from afar, because of the amount of granular control the app gives me over each of the toy's functions.
The Best Vibe for Discreet Play: Lyla 2
This petite egg-shaped vibrator comes highly recommended by sex therapist Leigh Noren. "As with all of Lelo's products, it's stylish, sleek, and luxurious," Noren explains, "but it's also explicitly made for couples." Slip it inside the vagina and it can be controlled with the included remote – great for discreet public play, or just for livening up a movie night at home.
The Best Finger Vibrator: Digit
The Best Waterproof Wand Vibe: Wand 2
If you want a wildly strong vibe you can use pretty much anywhere, it's hard to go past the We-Vibe Wand 2. This ultra-rumbly wand is fully waterproof, unlike almost any other toys in its category – so you won't have to sacrifice vibration strength to have sex in the shower, bath, pool, etc. I also love the shape of its head, which is rounded on one side and more angular on the other, allowing for sensations that are broader or more pinpointed depending on your mood.
The Best Sex Blanket: Fascinator Throw
Sex can be a messy endeavor, and it's no fun doing laundry immediately afterward so no one has to sleep in the wet spot. So, for the classy couple who likes to keep things clean while getting dirty, there's the Liberator Throw, a moisture-resistant sex blanket. It'll prevent any errant liquids from seeping through to your bedsheets, and its velvety texture feels lovely against the skin during sex, too. I've also found it useful to lay it down before giving or receiving a massage, since oil can stain sheets.
The Best Toy for Long Penises: Classic Stackable Rings
If you or your partner have ever felt discomfort or pain from deep penetration, the OhNut might be exactly what you need: it's a quartet of stackable rings that can be worn around the base of the penis to limit the depth of insertion during sex. You can wear just one, or all four, or anywhere in between. Either way, it'll feel good for both partners, as it's made of a polymer blend that's squishy, ribbed, and gradually warms to body temperature.
The Best Long-Distance Vibrator: Dolce
Lovense's toys are top-tier options for long-distance couples who want to connect better sexually, and this is one of the best ones in their lineup. It stimulates the clitoris and G-spot simultaneously – or separately, if you prefer – for intense blended pleasure. It's waterproof and pretty quiet, too. I especially love the flexible neck on this toy, as it allows for a custom fit that hits your spots just right.
The Best Vibrator for Grinding: Vibe
Lots of people like to masturbate by grinding against something – a pillow, their hand, etc. – and this vibe would be a fantastic upgrade for anyone who does, as it's designed specifically for that purpose. It's especially great in rear-entry positions like doggie-style: the receptive partner can hold the toy on their clit or grind against it while being penetrated. Most amazing to me is this vibe's nearly non-existent noise level; even at its highest speeds, it can barely be heard, so it's become a go-to for me when I'm staying in a hotel or with family and want to be discreet.
The Best Glass Dildo for Couples: 8" ribbed G-spot glass dildo
Glass is an underrated sex toy material: it can provide firm pressure against spots that enjoy that, like the G-spot and prostate, and it holds temperature well, often while looking quite beautiful. This glass dildo is especially couple-friendly because it can be used either solo or on a partner, either vaginally or anally, and the curved end and rippled end both work well as handles when you're penetrating a partner with this toy. Just make sure to stick it in a bowl of warm water for a few minutes before sex if you don't enjoy the glass's natural coldness – or you could do what I do and just sit on the dildo during foreplay so it'll be warm by the time you're ready to use it.
The Best Rideable Vibrator: Cowgirl
"It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking about sex toys as purely about physical pleasure, but they're so much more diverse than that," Noren points out. The psychological aspect of using toys together can be half the fun – for instance, this rideable vibrator is great for couples who enjoy voyeurism/exhibitionism and power play. One person can control the vibrations with the included remote, while they watch the other person ride the toy. I've found the Cowgirl to be more comfortable and easier to clean than the similarly-priced Sybian – but either way, you're still riding a floor-shaking behemoth of a vibrator, so this may not be the best pick for apartment-dwellers!
Why should couples use sex toys together?
First and foremost: Sex toys are worth a shot because they’re fun and they feel good, but also because they expand your options in the bedroom exponentially. “Sex toys can provide new kinds of stimulation to key erogenous zones,” emphasizes Elizabeth Ashford, founder of sexual wellness website Beyond the Beez.
They're especially helpful for closing the “orgasm gap,” a term that describes the disproportionate number of orgasms women experience compared to men in heterosexual relationships, mainly due to inconsistent clitoral stimulation during intercourse. Using a sex toy is a great workaround: “If your partner has a vulva, giving them 15 to 20 minutes of continuous clitoral attention can help them more reliably achieve orgasm and speed things up,” Ashford explains.
Reed also notes that toys can also be useful conversation-starters, especially if you and/or your partner struggle to communicate your needs in the bedroom. “Using sex toys together allows the couple to open up and be vulnerable about discussing wants and dislikes,” she says.
Some people get insecure about toys, believing they must be somehow inadequate if their partner needs external satisfaction during sex—but Ashford suggests thinking of them as supplements rather than replacements. “Remind your partner that the toy is not there to compete with them, but to enhance the experience for you both,” Ashford says.
If you already like to masturbate with toys, Reed suggests introducing your favorites into sex. The key is just to communicate openly first, she says, to ensure you're both comfortable and on the same page.
What makes a good sex toy for couples?
While there are many toys designed specifically for couples to use together, don't feel limited to ones explicitly billed for partnered play. “Any toy can be used by a couple, whether on one person or both, and in different ways,” Reed explains. For example, a small clitoral vibrator can be used as intended or can stimulate other erogenous zones on either person’s body, such as the nipples or inner thighs. (Just make sure to thoroughly clean any toy that’s been used in or around an anus to avoid spreading fecal bacteria elsewhere.)
Rechargeable vibrating toys are preferable over battery-powered ones, says Ashford, to avoid running out of juice in the middle of sex. She also recommends prioritizing body-safe materials like silicone or stainless steel over toys made with porous materials that can become breeding grounds for bacteria, or ones that contain harmful chemicals known as phthalates. The sex toy industry is unregulated, so you unfortunately can’t always trust what companies say about their own products’ safety and formulation. But to help you make the most informed choices, we've tapped some experts to hear about which picks they recommend, below. Presenting some of the best couples' sex toys around.
How to introduce sex toys for you and a partner
Communicate openly: It all starts with an honest conversation. “If you can't talk about it, then you may not be ready to try it physically,” Reed says. There's no need to feel shame or stigma around using sex toys (or any other sexual desire), so try not to approach the conversation from a place of guilt, apologies, or fear. Explain the excitement and pleasure that you think sex toys could give both of you and invite your partner to speak their mind.
Start small—literally: “I would recommend starting with discussing using a small vibrator,” Reed says. Some people are intimidated by bulky wand vibrators or realistic dildos, so they might not be the best starting point if your partner is new to sex toys. And if they're not, ask what turns them on most.
Experiment: Try a few different types of toys at first to see what you and your partner like most when using toys together. Your best bet may be a toy with multiple functions that you can try on different nights, a vibrator that works for penetrative sex can be used by itself just for clitoral stimulation, or with oral sex. Point is, a Swiss-Army-style sex toy is a good first step to discovering where your tastes lie.
How we chose the best sex toys for you and your partner
I’ve been a sex toy reviewer for over a decade—and luckily for me, my past and present partners have happily joined me for innumerable testing sessions over the years. (Apologies to anyone who’s ever had to deal with me whipping out a notebook mid-session to jot down thoughts on a toy we were using!)
Naturally, every couple has different needs, depending on each individual’s preferences and anatomy, but broadly speaking, the best couples’ toys share some key details: they're easy to operate in the heat of the moment, versatile, durable, and feel unobtrusive in use. These are the ones likeliest to stick around in my lineup of go-to toys, and they’re also the ones I feel most confident recommending to other couples.
Meet the sexperts
- Elizabeth Ashford, founder of sexual wellness website Beyond the Beez
- Chelsie Reed, sex therapist
Kate Sloan wrote the books 101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do and 200 Words to Help You Talk About Sexuality & Gender, cohosts the podcasts The Dildorks and Question Box, and has written about sex and relationships for various outlets, including Cosmopolitan, Teen Vogue, Playboy, and MEL.
